October 27th

I'm about to leave for school but I thought I'd update.
I'm hungry. Ny stomach hurts so bad.
I fucking love it though. I feel like it's just my body eating away the fat.
I was forced to go out to dinner last night and I basically had an emotional breakdown last night.
I havn't adjusted to making myself puke but I wanted all of the food I ate out of me. I felt discusting.
I just wont eat at all today though.
I gained weight. I'm now 169.
I'm a disappointment.
Cya.

This is going to be a freaking long post.

So it's been a few days since I have started this so I'm just gonna update about whats happenedd.

Good things:
-I've been drinking water like mad.
-Taking diet pills.
-I turned down a brownie at lunch the other day.
-I've been going or trying to go on walks everyday(just got back from one)
-One day I put a shit load of food in the oven and then I realized I didn't need that, I needed to be skinny, and I took them out. That was my favorite, I was so proud of myself.
-I've been eating louds of salad, and I just made my dad go get me low fat dressing.
-Drinking diet green tea(:
-I fasted all day yesterday (Saturday)
- I wrote down a shitload of inspirational quotes in my agenda book to remind me not to give up.

Bad things:
-When I have dinner with my family, I usually eat a lot.
-Friday I had a milkshake and french fries with my friends.
-I ate someone's sandwich and potatos at lucnh the other day.
-I usually have after school and midnight snacks.
-Sometimes i just feel like giving up and i binge.

Highlights:
-I got on the scale this morning and I was 168.8lbs. I havn't been under 170 in atleast a year.
-This was a huge step for me and it made me even more determined to keep fighting.
-I went to the homecoming dance last night and I looked super skinny in my dress. My boyfriend even said I looked thinner. Even though i felt like my arms looked huge.
-I've been able to fit into my sister clothes and shes a size smaller than me.
-The determination to fit into my sisters old prom dress it pushing me.
-Sometimes i can feel my stamach growling and I love it.

Not so bright times:
-I was so depressed the other night that I cut myself.
I know I shouldn't have done it and now I'm worrying that eople are going to see it.

Yay new blog!

Hey it's Charlotte:D


I've decided I need to make a blog to motivate me to lose weight.


I've been pro-ana for a bit now and I've tried dieting for a while now but I've decided to commit myself and eat as little as possible until i reach a happy weight.
I'm currently 174 pounds. I hope to get to 150 by January.

This is me now, I know discusting right?

That's why i need to do this diet. So I'm doing this diet I found on a website(link below) that's called the ABC diet and it gives you an amount of calories to eat that day.

So this is going to be my sort of diary and progress keeper.

It's cool if you wanna follow. I don't care. Advice is always good.

I just don't want those people that are gonna be like "staving yourself is never the answer". I really don't need that. But anyone who is going to help me do this and kind of listen to me as I go is well loved. Let's just hope I stay on top of this.

I'll start tomorrow with day 7 of the ABC diet.

http://pro-ana-angels.wetpaint.com

The site helping me the most(: